iGod

What are you looking at?

Be honest, do you like what you see in the mirror?

There’s no escaping it, in our culture looks matters. Ask any actor, musician, politician, or man in the street.  Our overall confidence and emotional well-being is tied up with it, which I guess is pretty good news if you are in the cosmetic business.

Talking of which, Dove, in their latest campaign for “Real Beauty”, recently hired Gil Zamora, an FBI forensic artist to prove that when it comes to looks, we are our own worst enemy.

He undertook a social experiment to illustrate the ongoing struggle women have with recognising their own beauty.

Without seeing his subjects, the forensic artist created composite sketches of women based on their own descriptions, plus a second sketch based on the description of a stranger that they spent a short amount of time with before the sketch.

The end result was extraordinary. In each case the woman’s own description was different than the description by the onlooker. Their faces were full of “flaws”, but when the stranger described them, the sketches were more accurate and more flattering. In an accompanying video a woman tears up as she realises her self-description resulted in a "fatter, sadder" version of herself, while the stranger saw her as "open, friendly and happy."

 

Dove research shows that women are their own worst critics. Only 4% of women around the world consider themselves beautiful.    

So yes, we do have an image problem. Now, I am not sure quite what percentage of men would consider themselves as good looking or handsome, but the ever-growing shelf of men’s products at my local chemist might be a good indication that low self-esteem and confidence are an issue for us too.

Of course, at one level, none of this should surprise us. We are constantly bombarded with advertising, magazines, films and TV programmes showing people’s skin to be clear, wrinkle and spot-free with symmetrical faces, straight noses and super white teeth.

Is it any wonder that our self-esteem plummets when we look at ourselves in the mirror? And as the weather warms up (finally) we will become even more conscious of our numerous imperfections and want to spend money to fix them.

Yet if we, perhaps, notice more of what we have rather than what we don’t have, our self-perception might just change a little.

Maybe we would stop comparing ourselves with others and for once not be left wanting.

When I read the Bible I don’t see beautiful, perfect, gorgeous people nominated by God to be an example to others. Instead, I see Moses with a stammer, who chose to have his brother Aaron speak on his behalf. I see Paul the Apostle suffering with a speech impediment, as well as well as having bad eyesight. Jesus himself was described as ordinary in appearance. His disciples were equally described as ordinary.

So here is another way to look at ourselves.

Polish psychologist Andrew Bienkowski, a man who was exiled to Siberia and starved himself to death so his grandson could eat his meagre rations, said that we could approach ourselves by thinking: I have breath! I have life! I have shelter! I am here…

Be inspired to see yourself differently. Look at the four basics of life. If you can say that you have breath, family, somewhere to live and some place to sleep you can say, “Thank God my life is full!”

God allows us to focus on his own perfection and goodness and to see ourselves as he sees us. We become grateful and satisfied and learn to avoid discontentment, which always leaves us wanting.

King David famously declares in Psalm 23 says, “The Lord is my shepherd and I shall not want.” So the big, fat, honest questions are: what is the “shepherd” of my life? And does it make me not want?

Our confidence and self-esteem can come from knowing that we are accepted by a loving and gracious God. And by those who know us, perhaps, better than ourselves.

So, come on, put that anti-wrinkle cream back and get real. You too guys!

ASD

A nice quote - closer to God

A great little quote from my friend Steve over at Verve and Verse. 

We are closer to God when we are asking questions than when we think we have the answers.

~ Abraham Joshua Heschel

ASD

What would you do if you knew you could not fail?

Would you swim the English Channel? Would you audition for X Factor? Solve world hunger? Wouldn’t it be great if we were guaranteed success in everything we touched?

Coming down from Mount Olympus, I wonder if a fear of failure stops us from going forward in life. Maybe there is a fear of failing in marriage because our parents divorced.  Maybe getting an education because we fear we will not have the commitment to see it through. We can end up counting the cost of failure more and totally miss the joy of trying.

When I was at school in the sixth form seven of us decided to cycle to North Wales to raise money for a Mountain activity centre in Snowdonia. For some dumb and inexplicable reason we choose to go in the February half term when it was bitterly cold and snowing. Considering that I had never cycled more than five miles in my life, you could say a cycle ride of 180 miles over three days was a risky strategy. Well, we made it and the local newspaper ran the headline “The Magnificent Seven.” Though I seem to remember in the film that only three of them made it. Anyway, moving on.

Life doesn’t give us any certainty, but certainly there is hope. In our church there is no stigma attached to failure. We come as we are. We come as failures being restored.

We have just come through Easter when the Church remembers the great sacrifice that Jesus made for us by dying on a rough wooden Roman cross. The Easter story tells us Jesus took our guilt and shame and substituted himself for us. We acknowledge that we can’t save ourselves from ourselves. It has to have divine involvement.

It’s amazing to think that the first pope of Rome, Peter, did not see himself as infallible, but a miserable failure before his reinstatement by Jesus.

He was one of Jesus’ closest friends, but when the tough got going he ended up denying Jesus three times to save his bacon. Not great qualifications for becoming the Pontiff of Rome you might think. Peter knew he had done wrong against God (sin) but received forgiveness from the only one that ultimately really matters. Furthermore, he was then trusted by Jesus to start the Church, which today sees a third of the world population following Jesus. Not a bad result for a failure.

So perhaps the question is not what would you do if you could not fail, but what will you do when you do? Contrary to some held beliefs, an authentic life in Christ does not live with continued guilt and shame, but allows us to come and be accepted for who we are, being set free and given new hope for a fail-safe future. Now you have to admit that is pretty cool.

ASD

A reflection for Good Friday - if you are religious or not

At noon, darkness came over the whole land until three in the afternoon. And at three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”).

When some of those standing near heard this, they said, “Listen, he’s calling Elijah.”

Someone ran, filled a sponge with wine vinegar, put it on a staff, and offered it to Jesus to drink. “Now leave him alone. Let’s see if Elijah comes to take him down,” he said.

With a loud cry, Jesus breathed his last. The curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. And when the centurion, who stood there in front of Jesus, saw how he died, he said, “Surely this man was the Son of God!” (Mark's gospel, the Bible)

My youngest daughter loves reading stories from her Children's Book of the Bible. I tend to let her chose one, which hopefully isn't too many pages. Amidst the other stories is the account of Jesus' death. The Church calls it Good Friday. To a child of seven or even a mature adult it is perhaps hard to see why this could in any possible way, shape or form be called a good day.

But here's the thing.

Even the most hardened of skeptics I meet admit that Jesus stood for life, love, justice and faith. Through history and society people have broadly cheered at his indignant approach to upsetting convention and exposing hypocrisy and abuse. But every hero apparently has his day and we get disprited when people don't live up to our hopes. Much like politicians and expensive footballers, I guess.

DId Jesus get too big for his boots or did the people big him up for their own needs? A large number really just wanted a king to lead a revolution and overthrow the Romans and live life again on their own terms again.

Last Sunday we rememembered Palm Sunday, the day when Jesus rode into Jersusalem at the time of the Feast of the Passover, not as a people's king or a vainglorious rebel leader, but as a pilgrim on a way to a festival on a donkey and colt.

On Maundy Thursday we remembered how he met with his closest disciples for the Passover meal, a meal that symbolised the salvation of the Jewish people, by the retelling of the story of their exodus from Egypt many hundreds of years previously. They had a last supper together in a upper room, taking the bread made without yeast and the cup of wine and passed them around to each other.

The night would end in betrayl by one disgruntled militant activist member whose trust in Jesus had worn thin by a lack of perceived action.

And so we come to Good Friday or bad Friday, depending on your viewpoint as a child or not. It may interest you to know that the cross was known as such a horrendous form of Roman torture and death that for the first part of the Church's development no reference to the cross as a symbol is to be found. it was only latterly in the Western church first that the cross started to be depicted as a main symbol of Christianity and that was through art as much as anything else.

Today, Jesus' death is overlooked by many in a secular society because he is seen as a narrow-minded, judgementalist, religious bigot out to conform everyone to one view, regardless of other views, cutlure etc.

However I have to say this is what others have made him, not himself. Much like in his day.

This 'king' did not live up to socio-political expectation at so many levels.

Firstly he never owned property, he always had something borrowed to him. His parents borrowed a stable (not born in a palace). He borrowed friends' houses to stay in (no possessions of his own). He borrowed a donkey and colt to ride in Jerusalem (not a steed). He borrowed a guest house room for the last supper. And at the end he even borrowed another man's tomb to be buried in.

Recently I heard atheist Rick Gervais say in an article in the New York Times that he thought he was a better Christian than Christians because he kept the 10 Commandments. He had come across those who profess to follow Jesus but had dubious actions, citing Ghandi who said. "I like your Christ, I don't like your Christians." Often the church has to be shamed by unexpected sources for it to come to its senses.

Sometimes It is hard to see beyond the moment and get perspective for Christians, agnostics and atheists alike. Easter gives our lives perspective whether we are religious or not.

So what makes Jesus' life, death and resurrection relevant for us today? Because his death historically happened in the hands of a secular institution, the Roman Empire, and so stopped it from becoming a small religious regional affair, making it unknowingly everybody's business. Hence, becoming a world faith across all cultures and backgrounds today.

The Easter story slows us down to remind us of our falibility and human weakeness. It reminds us that untimately we all want to be saved from something or ourselves.

Beyond being one of the earliest human rights activists, Jesus Christ demonstrated a purity that most of us, if we are honest with ourselves, yearn for. It came with great and awful sacrifice.

We want hope. We want to believe in better. We, therefore, need to be reminded of the pain to gain.

So when I wish you happy Easter, I mean 'happy Easter!'

May you find peace and love in the power of his life, death and resurrection.

ASD

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The language of the Church

I have been around the block a bit and discovered that we love coming up with new ways to say old things. Carl Medearis in his excellent blog talks about the good and bad connotations of words such as Christian and Church.

As someone who has spent a good part of my other life at looking at companies' brand I am always having to ask people 'what does your name stand for?' What do you think is people's perception of you?'

A little while back I had the privilege of working with a youth movement called Crusaders who brought me in to look at their brand. When Crusaders started life through the missionary Albert Kestin back in 1900 it's name was not seen as contentious, but UK society has changed and nearly 1 in 5 of us are now immigrants. That includes many from Middle Eastern backgrounds. So the Crusaders naturally drums up all sorts of unhelpful strange images of a Christan youth movement. Not good, so today they are called Urban Saints.

The trouble with words is that are not just descriptors, they can have many meanings. Carl is right when he says for some "Christian" can mean "I’m a right-wing fundamentalist who doesn’t like Gays and am anti-choice and anti-women and anti-progress, because I’m stuck living in my own private reality of 1950’s...”

So It is helpful to find ways to say what we are and what we aren't to remove some of the obstacles of finding faith in God.

To be called a "follower of Jesus" is not a bad place to start. To borrow from the marketing school of Ronseal, it does exactly was it says on the tin.

ASD

WordLive now available as an iPhone and iPad app

Scripture Union had just launched their new Bible reading service WordLive with an app. And good it looks too.

My only niggle is it is it isn't free like the online experience, but I guess they are a charity and they have been through a torrid time of late. But I do wonder if it might be more attractive to someone wanting to casually look at the Christian faith without having to pay for it. Just a thought.

However, for those of you who, like me, value WordLive and have £2.99 to spare, then there are worse things to dig deep in your pocket for, i.e a £3 bet at Ladbrookes on England getting through the World Cup without at least one game going to penalties.

Well done, SU!

ASD

6 Priorites of a Vineyard church

Happy Easter!

I get asked all sorts of questions when people visit our church. Sometimes in the form of why don't you do this or do that? 

If the person is already an established Christian looking for a new spiritual home, it may be rooted in a value that is held dear to them and is part of their tradition. I suppose they  are wondering if it could be part of ours too to help them make the transition.

At the end of the day, we are simply trying to be followers of Jesus. He is our everything. We worship Him and want to be His dedicated followers. So we have 6  distinctive priorities for us as a Vineyard.

(By the way, for us a priority is something that we spend our time money and energy on. Otherwise, to be frank, however much we talk or write about it is no priority at all.)

1. Our first priority is worship. We want to love Him with our songs and our lives. We love Him because He first loved us.

2. Our second priority is the Word. Our desire is to know the Bible, experience what it talks about and do what it commands us to do. The Bible is our standard for the Christian life.

3. Our third priority is fellowship. Christians are not meant to be alone. We are meant to share life together, learning to know and love each other. This is why our church is divided into small groups in order to make our family feel intimate and knowable.

4. Our fourth priority is ministry. We believe and practice that every member of the church is a minister, not just the head guy. We all get to participate in the work of the church. God gives the church leaders, not to do all the ministry, but to equip the people to do their part.

5. Outreach is our fifth priority. As God blesses us, we are to become a blessing to others. All around us are lost, broken, poor people, who need the resources that God has freely given the church. We are not to hoard, but be generous.

6. Our sixth priority is prayer. All this is to be done in an atmosphere of love, acceptance and forgiveness. Our God is a gracious God! May He meet you in His mercy and power.

Now in the Vineyard movement we may have different local expressions on how these priorities look, but we are united with love and respect for each other. This is why I love the Vineyard tribe and I why I am grateful it loves me.

I truly believe in the one Church and love all of it. However, I fully recognise that the Vineyard is just one small tiny expression of it for our time. But, as Rick Warren of Saddleback Church said, "We do need all kinds of churches to reach all kinds of people."

ASD

Sermons with Text Appeal

I am not sure if you have yet encountered this phenomenon of a pastor in church on a Sunday morning encouraging you to text in with your questions on the talk. However, this is what Mark Driscoll at Mars Hill Church in Seattle is asking his lot to do.

I have experienced this once myself at a New Frontiers Church where I think they may have got the idea from. For the subject matter that morning I thought it was an excellent idea as it allowed a certain anonymity on a delicate issue.  However, it will probably take a speaker some time to adjust to the fact that people are fiddling with their mobiles rather than having their seemingly full attention.

Christianity Today has an article which is well worth reading on this matter. Full of anecdotes. Some of us may feel it is not quite our cup of coffee, especially if our church is more in the traditional mould, Nevertheless, it is good to be open to new ideas and embrace the technological opportunities of this age.

ASD

People's Testimonies on Cardboard

Sometimes we can lose sight of what being a Christian means. Ultimately, It should mean we 'change'.

Authentic faith in Jesus Christ is not 'religious' or merely a philosophical stance, but something that is tangibly real. To that end I simply love this well produced video by Bournemouth Vineyard that appears on the their home page. Although quite long in length, I found it utterly compelling, moving me to shed more than the odd tear or two.

As a leader it reminded me what a privilege it is to be used by God to see lives changed, but whoever you and whatever you believe are I am sure you'll be moved too.

ASD

Kindness at Christmas

I have been in Pret a Manger this lunchtime buying their redoubtable Christmas sandwich. Apart from being a great festive munch the sandwich will also mean a donation being made to Crisis, the homeless charity. A charitable thing, indeed!

However, while waiting to be served I saw their poster on the wall which said how they give free food and vans to the homeless. However, they were quick to say that it was not because they were "nice" people, but because they hate good food going to waste at the end of the day. I don't know about you, but this kind of sends out mixed messages to me.

it is funny how being "nice" is a somewhat out of vogue virtue. The adage goes if people are being nice to you they want something. It is a cynical view and not totally unfounded.

Recently a well known atheist entertainer suggested that Christians are "kind" to manipulate people's feelings, to lull them into their net of deception. At least, that is the gist of one of his myopic arguments. Sad, really.

Of course, as marketing techniques go, the offer of something apparently "free" only to "pay later" is a well tried and tested way to acquire business. It's giving with "terms and conditions".

As someone who loves doing acts of random kindness for people, I have to be honest and say I get very little out if it in the sense of seeing huge amounts of people added to the church.  I enjoy bringing some happiness into someone's life, but If I was doing it to be manipulative you would have to say I am not doing it very well!

However, I am trying to show Jesus, The Jesus who loves with no strings attached. Not the fundraising Jesus for a leaky roof or the TV evangelist Jesus who wants you to ring in with your credit card details. That's not my Jesus. God save us!

Have I got an agenda? You bet!

It is to show people that there is a God that loves them without a set of terms and conditions or a "buy now, pay later" scheme.  My God is the God of freewill, not a God of trickery, manipulation or illusion that looks to beguile the innocent and vulnerable. My God doesn't need gimmicks or to entertain to get your attention.

Being kind is different to being "nice".  "Nice" is twee and arguably skin-deep.

Kindness cares. Kindness costs. Kindness is compassion. It is also often a forgotten fruit of the Spirit.

Kindness is no kitten.

ASD